toughest day in a long while. over the day there were people throwing hissy fit and giving out ugly words just because a little bird talked to her, when she was in her vineyard. directors without a sense of what's going on and stayed on the fence and being weak about everything; colleagues who don't honor the whole system of majority and teamwork; colleagues who gets defensive and back away one hundred miles per second when being tested with a little work, whoa, and when it's just trying to test the water to see who has your back! 


things were quite ugly. i want to escape. 


i escaped. turned off my phone and went to bed reading my favourite children book, wondering since when, exactly when in our 24 years of life did we learn how to be so spiteful to each other? when did we learn to be so selfish and self absorbed? and didnt we sort of cultivated sportsmanship at a certain point in our growing years? learn how to honor teamwork and majority choices? show kindness? help your people? return people's help? please and thank yous? shut up even if you feel like giving out? and know that alot of times the word sorry is not gonna work so you've gotta shut up? wow. and i read till the part when a little girl was collecting litters and sell bottles for candy. love. 


i woke up to a message from my mom, telling me to do what i feel and think is right, trying her best to calm me down with her words. it's been so long since i go to mom regarding petty school issues. often when i am confused as to what i should do, i think of what my parents would want me to do in situations like this, and i think of what they have always taught me since i was young, and i do what i think is right even if the whole world acted in another way, and sometimes it isn't the easiest thing. over the weekend my friend and I we talked about upbringing, and how it's always being reflected. my parents spent their whole life teaching me and i am thankful to have strong father and mother figures, and i want to honor that in all that i do, at least. and mom, i am good.